Business-womanning and a brush with death

Actual photo of me Business-Womanning.

I am now a Business Woman so technically any photo of me from now on is a photo of a Business Woman, even this one,

I decided when I started this business that it would all have to align with my core values and one of those is having fun. I don't know about you but I don't tend to think of fun when I think of Business Women. That's been one of the challenges for me in deciding to start this business - I thought that someone like me couldn't be a business person. But hey, here I am. Business-womanning like a boss! (Well, a baby business woman anyway).

It's largely been a lot of fun. Even the bits I thought I wouldn't like have been fun. And I've had actual customers! People who bought my stuff! And some of them are people I don't even know!

So, onto the brush with death bit, I have a health issue that I've been on a waiting list for months to get a scan for. My doctor told me that the next time I was in a lot of pain I should go straight to A&E, which I did last week. A few days later I had a call from the hospital saying that they had looked at my xray and I needed to come straight in and pack my bags for a stay.

A quick google of the issue they found scared the bejeezus out of me. It meant urgent surgery and possible death.

Scary biscuits right? Plus I live on my own with my kids so on a practical level it's not easy to just up and leave. I called around and got some help with the kids and packed my bags while thinking, what do I want to be wearing if I'm gonna die? 

I put my decriminalise t-shirt in, cause even though it's a t-shirt which I rarely wear and it's black which is a colour I don't tend to wear, I wanted my last moment to be an act of activism and solidarity to the people of Northern Ireland who are fighting for abortion rights. It would make a good news story and would be a fitting end to my life as an activist. 

Luckily I did't die and here I am. They did more tests, found that their concerns of my imminent death were unfounded and I was able to come home to my worried babies.

I'm glad I didn't panic. I was scared, but not panicking. I was worried about what would happen to my kids if anything happened to me. I kept thinking, "I just can't die until my youngest turns 18."

Then I would think of all those mothers with a terminal cervical cancer diagnosis, and how they too no doubt thought that they couldn't possibly die while their kids were young. And how sometimes we can't will something into being, no matter how we try. Some things are just out of our control.

I'm feeling really grateful to everyone who has supported me, my family and the business in our first few weeks. And I'm really excited about what's to come in the next few weeks...

Bring it on!